Very painful for me to read this account, Becca, but I'm so very glad I did! I'm a birthmother. Your account is my worst nightmare. I was a child myself when I was pregnant, and my family told me, no support, no love, I had to relinquish my baby. Believe me, I am well aware of the struggles of self-acceptance. I wish you love and abundance and healing. Always. Thank you for being so open.

p.s. I did reunite with my daughter, it's been a rocky ride, but I'm glad we at least know each other. And she knows that I loved her then, and still do. What gets torn apart in adoption is life-lasting for the birthmother and adoptee, and not an easy ride. But, it is ours to have. (I don't think adoptive parents, the other part of the triad, suffer emotionally in the same way.)